Weekly Shot #3

Tip Your Nurses

You didn’t think I was going to stop writing just because we had another kid did you? News flash – I didn’t do jack shit while my wife was struggling to push new life out of her. There are only a few things as a husband you must do while your wife is in labor. First, shut up. Your two cents mean nothing and even if you are just talking to quell your own nerves your job is to sit there and only be noticed when needed. Second, stay out of the way. There are people who are actually necessary in this scenario and you are not one of them. Don’t start watching screens as if you know what the numbers mean or make suggestions you know nothing about. In the end, I was my wife’s little errand boy which, besides the intense worry lasting the entire day, is easier than my day job. But if you sit me in any place as crazy as a hospital for 36 hours I have no choice but to come out with material.

Speaking of my day job, it’s always good to get some perspective from life changing events. Watching your wife give birth is one such event.  Both times I have left the hospital with a kid in hand and in awe of the people who make giving birth relatively easy (compared to birth say a couple hundred years ago). In a world where everyone acts as if the sky is falling because they have a hang nail or have been “bullied” on-line, it’s refreshing to watch people deal with real life and death scenarios every day with a semblance of grace. So when I sit at my computer for my daily nine to five or wake up before the kids to write, it’s nice to remember that my job or my writing isn’t life or death. They are both luxuries and I’m glad to be able to do both. Though I take them both seriously, the doctors and nurses of the world are people under real pressure and it helps to remember that when dealing with your everyday “stress”.

This brings me to the point of this blog. Why don’t we tip nurses? These people quite literally save lives and they don’t get so much as a fist bump after they do. Imagine a world where we tip waiters and waitresses 15% for the devastatingly hard job of…walking out a plate of food to a table. I do this nightly and get zero monetary reward. Don’t get me wrong, I tip the shit out of waiters and people in the hospitality industry in general. One time, severely inebriated, I tipped a cab driver one hundred dollars for a twenty-minute ride (I was extremely thankful to be home). Think of the word hospitality. HOSPITALity. It’s right there in the name. In a world where automated machines now ask for tips the least we can do is start tipping the people who matter.

P.S. – I think we should leave a tip for everyone involved in a birth. The photographer, security guards, definitely the anesthesiologist, and anyone else who made the experience a little less stressful than it inherently is. My wife will be getting a push present, which is just a nice way to say: a big ass tip!

P.P.S. – Of course I didn’t actually leave a fucking tip. They bled me dry for $1,200 (thanks, health insurance). You think I can afford to break off $20 a head when I got formula being added to my weekly expenses? Yea right. Maybe next time. But it’s the thought that counts.